Words from my aunt:
I saw “Skyfall” last night. Meh. More of the same but not as much (although Javier Bardem should get an Oscar). I used to eat a cereal called Cracklin Bran. I ate that cereal, I kid you not, every night and day for about 8 years. Then one time I was sitting down to eat and I took a spoonful in my mouth as usual (it’s a really tasty cereal) and my throat closed. It was like, “SPIT IT OUT ANNIE”. I couldn’t swallow it and I didn’t. And I haven’t had any since! I loved that cereal! Sometimes I see it now and wonder if I could have some, but I don’t. So, I feel the same way about Hollywood movies now. Why support the movie industry when it hates my guts (and my guts seem to now want to not have it either)? Why? In addition, why give a cent to an industry that literally has functional, effective, healthy, values that should be perpetuated rather than made fun of, in it’s crosshairs? I am SO SICK of the umpteenth movie on the “grotesque nightmare” of “suburban married life”‘; assholes, there are more marriages that are functional than not and why not HELP the idea of the only institution that can most successfully nurture future human beings than HURT it by focusing on the really weird ones? Hmmmm? Ask any kid if they like divorce (except in extreme cases). And yet, divorce, what’s that? The word is don’t ever even get married in the first place, it’s so bourgeois! Why do we follow these people? Dan Quayle WAS right, we know that now. Oh but EXCUSE ME, I’m talking about “social conservatism” when I’m supposed to be only a “fiscal conservative”, otherwise I’m just an uncool drooling redneck. And that dork face Rick Santorum, priggish YES, but look beyond that to the “traditional” values he tries to tout that are good for YOU and good for society; admit it, they are. Yes, not everyone’s marriage makes it, not everyone can go without smoking pot every hour or drinking themselves into oblivion, but can anyone not admit it’s a good thing to stay sober? Howabout all those countless celebrities spouting off about how horrible their lives were until they got “sober”? Oh, so then it’s ok? We “social conservative’s” have known that for awhile! And “reproductive rights”, like all of a sudden there are hoards who want to make “birth control” illegal? Give me a break! It was about forcing religious companies to purchase a product that was against their beliefs, it would be like forcing Californians to buy plastic grocery bags and buy them for others! God forbid! And howabout abortion being , “safe, legal, and rare”, remember that one? Clintons rode in on that, and I say FINE, safe legal and rare. “RARE” you say? Hey, “get your hands off my vagina effing Republicans”. Even Naomi Wolf, feminist extraordinaire, once touted having mini funerals for the dead products of the womb (you google it). Has anyone who is rabidly pro abortion ever SEEN an abortion? With ultrasound? That’s something to be proud of supporting? You tube has some amazing stuff on it omigosh. Why would I be ashamed of thinking such a procedure should NOT be sacrosanct? Liberals are all about fairness. Talk about “fair”, what’s so fair about getting your life snuffed out because someone forgot to take birth control? And DON’T TELL ME THEY COULDN’T AFF0RD IT that is a joke. I’ll even say abortion is a necessary evil, but it IS an EVIL and I’m not ashamed to say so, so there. If that makes me a Neanderthal than so be it; oh wait a minute, abortion, infanticide, death for birth defects, you name it, was the RULE in ancient societies, before the dreaded “Judeo-Christian” thingy came into effect, my bad. Go on self destruct on yo bad selves, but we gotta come with, that’s the bummer. Honest to god, if Jay Z and Matt Damon et al wanted to pay more taxes what the hell was stopping them?? Their guilt motivates them to want to pay more taxes, “oh I’ll pay more to the government so THEY will help poor people and I can say I gave at the office”, and their sense of “fairness” wants OTHERS, not just them, to be forced to give more taxes too; but we know when you give money to the government it disappears down a black hole! Mitt Romney may have paid 15% taxes but over 50 PERCENT of his income went to charity! That’s because he (and Warren Buffet) KNOW that THEY can do a better job managing getting their $ help to needy people! Obama and Biden gave, like 1% to charity. Oh, I guess that’s cuz the gov does such a good job of distributing it, yeah right. I gotta hand it to the Democrats, those dudes and gals are AMAZING at what they do to get their guy elected, in sheer terms of efficacy, it’s mind blowing. Well, lets hope their guy’s policies really do work, lets hope that, even though climate changes naturally and has been changing since the beginning of time, that He can make it stop; lets hope that even though, since the 70′s the Hollywood scientists have been telling us the end is near (first it was cooling, than warming, then overpopulation, ETC), even though, even with Europe not flushing their toilets and dissing mini pads and plastic bags since at least the 80′s (and there’s still an environmental threat??), even with mercury filled light bulbs, and even with Toyota Pious’s (not a spelling error) and windmills and food grown for car’s engines, even with plastics banned (hmmm, what about their precious iphones, ipads, tv sets, computers, ETC, ALL made with plastics..did you know PLASTIC is a by product of the dreaded oil we evil republicans advocate driling for w/out which life as we know it would cease?), in spite of all this, lets be like Lucy and Charlie Brown, she’s holding the football for Charlie to kick, he kicks it EVERY time, with trepidation, knowing she’s been wrong every single time with her promises not to pull it away and cause him to fall on his ass. Hey, THIS time these guys will be right, their policies will save the earth, feed clothe and house all peoples, AND raise GDP and fix families yearning for stability. Yes, I’m there, I’m repentant, I’m hopeful, THANK YOU JAYZEES! Amen.

A few notes when voting.
*If you see anything suspicious like extra ballots being handed out or people being turned away SAY SOMETHING. Find a poll watcher and tell them.
*If anyone tries to stop you from entering a polling place, call the police and report them
*Do not…I REPEAT DO NOT stay home if you hear your state is called for Obama before you vote. The State-run media is trying their hardest to trick you into staying home. DO NOT FALL FOR IT.

The black panthers are back (or Obama Goon Squad as I call them) in Philly. This cannot continue. If any of you are in PA, call the authorities to handle this mess. They should not be in front of or anywhere near any polling station. DO NOT believe any of the “Fear Porn” (h/t Kevin @ HillBuzz) out there about Romney losing. Don’t read it if it scares you and don’t pass it around either. Fear porn is BAD FOR YOU. And fear porn peddlers need to be put out of business.

And I want to leave you with words from the great Ronald Reagan to remind you what we are really facing. One of the things that bothers me so much about the left is their disdain for looking back, but those who don’t learn from history are destined to repeat it. Appeasement and making nice with terrorists will never work in our favor…See Libya. ‘Nough said.

It’s only going to get worse for him from this point out. Romney is going to pummel him, wake him up with smelling salts and then pummel him again just for fun. I was a little worried about three months ago but all that has changed.

You’ve never seen so much Republican motivation to vote. I haven’t seen one Obama sign and I am in Illinois! Not one bumper sticker….not one t-shirt. (Update: Mr. Fox just informed me he saw one. Just one.) It is decidedly NOT 2008. It is 2012 and the people are feeling a worse squeeze than when the Lightbringer took office. Hate to break it to you Barry, but you just don’t cut it.

So I’m jazzed. I’m giddy. I’m walking on air because my country is about to return to sanity where folks earn what they work for, keep what they make and drill for oil we’re sitting on. So because of this good mood, I’m going to share my recipe for the fried green tomatoes with Chipotle ranch dip. I’m munching on. them right now and let me tell you….wow. If you have some tomato plants out back, chances are there are a bunch of green ones on the vine. Go grab some.

Fried Green Tomatoes with Chipotle Ranch

Wash and slice into 1/4 thick slices and salt.Mix together some flour with a few pinches of cajun spice. beat a few eggs in another bowl to make an egg wash. I usually thin with a little water to make them go further. Then put another bowl or plate out for your breadcrumbs or panko crumbs. I used crushed up dry stuffing last time because I was out of breadcrumbs and it worked great! Dip slices in flour mixture first, then egg then breadcrumbs and drop into 1 inch or so of hot oil.

(Do not EVER cover oil on the stove. I have to tell people this every time I mention deep frying because my dear friend once put a lid on oil and when she went to uncover it the oxygen caused an explosion and set her on fire. In a panic she ran for help and the fire spread up her arm and down her back. Luckily, she ran right into a fireman. For real. How’s that for providence? She’s fine but she was badly burned and almost killed. The recovery for burns like that is unspeakable. So DON’T EVER cover hot oil.)

Uncovered hot oil is very safe and easy to work with. Drop the tomatoes in one at a time and let them sit for a few minutes. Then turn when brown on one side and continue to cook until brown all over and transfer to cool on paper towels. Salt and eat! Also, if you have leftovers, these freeze awesomely. Just put fried tomatoes in a freezer bag, label and freeze. When you want to enjoy them again turn on the oven at 350 and just heat them up like you would chicken nuggets. They are excellent this way. It’s best to make a big batch and then freeze the leftovers because they make a great anytime snack or a terrific veggie dinner (which more of us have had to turn to in this Obamaconomy that’s about to get upended by the Romneybus.)

Sauce

Ranch dressing one small can chipotle peppers in adobo sauce Chipotle peppers are very hot but if you use a small amount you can control the heat. I usually chop one pepper and add to a small dipping bowl of ranch dressing and mix. This is so tasty you won’t believe it. Far FAR better than any prepared nonsense in the store. Trust me. If you really like to do your own thing you can make ranch too. Google that…I just buy the stuff. Enjoy!

Gosh I love Autumn. It makes me want to shout poetry at the sky. I know…weird.

Painting by Veronica Fox, age 6

So it puzzles me when I hear the Lefty Democrats trying to court “the middle class.” They HATE us. First of all, we’re employed. This makes us the enemy. We’re not the “downtrodden” who needs the “hand up” they keep talking about. We’re the ones who have too much. They’d like you to believe they’re talking about people who make more than you but they’re not. Even if the government confiscated all the wealth of the country’s wealthiest millionaires and billionaires they’d run out of money in a matter of days. (Someone did the math. It’s true.) The only way they can get the trillions more money they want to fund all their great ideas is to take it from us; the many that make up the middle class.

They hate meat eaters, which is who makes up most of the middle class. They want us to eat more kale for inexplicable reasons that probably have to do with making us too weak to fight back a government invasion. They hate guns, and the middle class owns lots of guns. They are constantly trying to limit the middle class access to their guns (while at the same time doing nothing to limit the “downtrodden’s” access to the illegal gun trade which leads to 30 deaths a week in Chicago.)

They hate children. While the middle class is busily trying to get pregnant by any means necessary (invitro, fertility drugs, adoption, strange Chinese herbs, acupuncture, etc.) the Left is trying to convince us we love abortion. Actually, the middle class hates it. It’s the “downtrodden” areas the Left targets with their abortion mills aborting minority babies and smashing Hitler’s record. They pretend birth control is as important as the air we breathe, but the middle class disagrees. We tend to think affordable gasoline is more necessary.

They hate food chains we all love. They hate Chili’s and Olive Garden and McDonald’s and Chickfila. They do their best to convince us the food is poison but we don’t listen and we still go to Red Robin for a giant heart attack on a plate because we like burgers and we’re adults, thank you very much. They tell us we should go to shi-shi raw food bars and drink wheat grass and all other manner of food that my dog wouldn’t touch. They want us to buy expensive organic produce with weird names I can’t pronounce. The middle class chooses to buy normal produce, wash it well and pray over it before ingesting.

They hate God. They hate religion and the morality it brings. They have fought to break down American morality for many many years and they may be on the verge of succeeding in some circles, but not in the middle class. God is still very alive in the middle class. We go to church, Bible studies, MOPS groups, take part in women’s ministries, feed the poor, introduce drug addicts to healing and not food stamps, collect food and give it away and march in the right to life walks. The Left doesn’t want you to give to the poor, they want to FORCE you to give to the poor of their choice. (Like “poor” teacher’s pensions who make $76,000 a year in Chicago average.)

They hate stay at home moms. If you’re raising your children at home yourself, you are part of the hated middle class. They spread rumors that it’s a “luxury” for you to be where you are. They whip up class envy against you even though you may have sacrificed a second car or a bigger house so you could raise your own children. But beyond that, they hate you because you are raising your children with those middle class values they hate so much. And if you homeschool, you’re an even bigger threat because they won’t be able to get their social claws into your kids in state institutions. You could be raising the next John Adams and that is totally unacceptable to the Left. What they want are more community organizers like Saul Alinsky and Barack Obama. They want more union drones, more group-thinkers and collectivists not more Sarah Palins. They certainly don’t want free-thinking patriots.

They hate patriotism. If you even need an example, just remember the Democrats who wouldn’t wear flag pins after 9-11 or the president himself who refused to put his hand over his heart during the national anthem. Their use of our colors is like blasphemy because they mock the red white and blue by using it for their anti-American agenda. They support flag burning but are against Koran burning. And yet, they want you to believe they share your middle class values. They lift up soldiers at their convention while at the same time refusing to let those on the battlefield fight and win the way they can. Instead we take casualty after casualty. They don’t love soldiers, they hate them. And soldiers’ families? They send them form letters with Obama’s signature in auto-pen when they lose their heroes. They constantly try to undercut funding from soldiers to give it to teacher’s unions. They don’t love soldiers. You know who does? The middle class. Don’t be fooled. If you’re middle class, no one in the Democrat party loves you or wants the best for you. They simply want to raid your life to pay for their voters’ “needs”.

Perhaps we should start a third party called The Middle Class party.

The following article in the American Spectator finally shed the light on this thing that has been pulling at my mind. Bravo Jeffrey Lord! They don’t love the middle class. They hate you. Read the whole thing. It’s illuminating.

For those of you who’ve never heard the whole song that I sang a snippet of on WLS last night, here it is!

One thing the contestants and I all agreed on was that we were shocked that anyone entered this contest at all and that there were even 10 entries to choose from! (We just figured we were the only nerds who would do this.) It turns out that over 100 entries were submitted. I feel very honored to have made it to the live broadcast.

I know many of you were very concerned because you said my last 90 seconds was cut off by a commercial. The station says no, that it all aired but many of you didn’t hear it. The production staff is going to send me recordings of it and I will post it when I get it so that those of you who missed it can hear the whole thing. If it was cut off on the air, it’s okay, it was still fair because the judges got to hear the whole thing and they had 80% of the decision.

The person who really kept me going through all of this was my awesome husband, Mr. Fox. He was so supportive and so encouraging for the last few weeks. He turned out the vote on a daily basis and did more than his fair share to see me in the finals. Thanks also to all my friends and family who came out to see me last night and also tuned in. I love you guys!

Tonight is the big night! I need your help again. Thanks to your votes I made the final 5 contestants for the next WLS Talk Star! Tonight is the finale and I’ll be on a live broadcast at 6pm CST on 890AM (and iheartradio for those of you out of state who want to listen on your phone or other device). Please listen and text in your votes for me! Kevin DuJan at HillBuzz will be live blogging during the event and giving specific instructions so you may follow that on his site here. Also, those of you who are friends of mine on FB can see instructions posted there as we get them.

Don’t forget to listen in tonight! The winner gets a 2 hour talk show on WLS and a trip to Mexico. I am so excited for this opportunity. Thanks for all your support!

“You didn’t build that . . .”

- President Obama

July 27, 2012

Dear Mr. Obama,

Normally when you utter something so colossally idiotic I tend to see what everyone else does and if its all been done I’m not going to throw out my opinion on the matter. The “Obama Depression” is about to claim the last bit of my 401K and I’m trying to get this new idea off the ground so I’m a bit busy. This little letter writing gig is a voluntary effort, with all due respect to those who seem to think I’m a some famous writer grand standing their true self, or some rich guy doing this because I need to vent. I’m none of that. If I did make that claim I would be as bad as you. Because through out these reactions to that utterance I realized something.

You, Sir, did not build you. Please allow me to explain. Every step of your life has been prepared for you. Every moment you were pampered and buffed for the next phase like some kind of imaginary character in a television program. From your mother to your girlfriends to your job history and your lack of real world skills. It’s frankly miraculous that you kept the facade up for so long. To repeat; you did not build you, someone else did that.

Well, us common folk “Joe Doakes’s” out in the hinterland don’t have that option. We don’t have the safety net of a group of rich socialist friends that are going to protect us at every turn. We are on our own. And for every improvement we make in our lives there is someone out there, thanks to all of your class rhetoric, that thinks they have a legitimate claim on my labor or my dwindling wealth.

You never felt blame. You never had to stare back at your wife and explain why that second mortgage isn’t getting paid. You never had to live with less so others could have more. You never had to sacrifice what you wanted so someone else could have a shot. You never built a life on merit and exposure to risk nor attempted to serve the public good in the vain of politicians like Henry Clay. You never did that.

There’s this guy running for office. His name is Mitt Romney. He has done nothing but that. No one told him when to “zig” or “zag.” No one told him to do what when. He just did it. Mr. Romney is a “Do the right thing” machine. That’s what he does. He’s like one of those perpetual motion machines that you could buy. You can just count on it. That’s what America needs, someone it can count on to relieve it from the madness that is Washington D.C. by any means necessary. Because if you haven’t noticed you didn’t build that city.

We did.

Respectfully,

Joe Doakes

The media went along with Alred’s claims, never questioning the background of this Chicago woman who at one time lived in Obama-goon David Axelrod’s building. (I don’t even remember her name, nor do I care to.) She wasn’t important, it was taking out Cain that mattered. Since the media set a new standard of guilty until proven innocent, Kevin DuJan of HillBuzz and I set out to investigate claims made about rumors of President Obama’s sexual escapades with Larry Sinclair in the back of a limo in Chicago in the 90′s. After all, we had as much evidence as anyone in the press who was convinced Cain was a groping maniac. Sinclair has been telling his story to anyone who would listen since 2008, and none of the main press was among his audience.

Now the Romney tax return business has gone to the top of the headlines with Harry Reid declaring he got a phone call from an unnamed source who told him Romney hasn’t paid his taxes in 10 years. Instead of demand the source, the press has demanded Romney prove his innocence. Working from this example, it is now fair game to throw out any allegation ever insinuated about Obama and demand he prove otherwise. Here are a few accusations that might be fun to bat around.

*I’ve actually had a conversation with a NAMED source, Larry Sinclair, who says he performed oral sex on the president in the back of a limo possibly driven by Tony Rezko’s driver.

*Someone at Columbia said he believed Obama and his Pakistani roommate were lovers.

*There are rumors all over Chicago that Obama belonged to gay bathhouse “Man’s Country” before he was a senator

*Some say the reason we haven’t seen Obama’s school records is because he was a D student.

*Some say they saw Obama smoke crack

There are many more of these rumors and stories floating around because the press refuses to do its job and vet this man so I say it’s time to start writing about them as if they are facts (like the other media does to us) until someone proves otherwise. As far as I’m concerned, Barack Obama is the first crack-smoking gay president who flunked out of college.

Prove me wrong.

In the meantime, HillBuzz and I will be attempting to memorialize all the sites in Chicago where Obama had major events in his life like drug deals and gay liaisons. We may even get lucky and find the communist party headquarters where he attended meetings. (You didn’t hear that? Someone called and told us.)